Yesterday and Today

Well, here is an update on how life is going. It has been nearly a year since Shontel and I left Nashville to come to Cookeville so I may finish my education. To say that it has been a trial would be a serious understatement. Here is the rundown: I was at a decent job, had a decent place to live, made decent money, went to a good church, had good friends, had a good mechanic, good vacations, and lived a rather easy existence. So one must first understand that we did not have to leave our livelihoods for the calling of higher education because life was sitting at a rare state of contentment. But I was not content. You see, I have brains. Ever since I was a young boy, while my brothers were out getting dirty under a car hood or playing sports with our cousins, I was indoors brisking away hours on end of artistic pursuits. I drew pictures, I read books, magazines, listened to music, and did every other thing that a creative, knowledge-craving mind would do. So this is not to say that people who work on cars and play sports do not have brains, but this is to say that my awareness of a desire to know more was more evident from a young age. So to tie this together with one year ago in Nashville...I was an adult now with a lovely new wife, just working another day for another dollar. Well, I felt stagnant. I felt the same way water does when it just rests in a specific spot with neither heat to evaporate it nor ground to absorb it. It is a terrible feeling to have when you know that God has put into your gut a desire to know more about the world and beings He created and you are just chained to a wall to watch it pass you by. Since I have never been one to be content to sit tight and be patient, I took the initiative to go on a quest. I had been attending evening classes off and on for the past couple of years and soon decided that educating myself at night while depleting my brain cells during the day was a terrible imbalance that needed to be corrected. So long story short, my wife and I took a step of faith and made a transition from the workplace to the classroom, or at least I did with her unwavering support. We settled on Tennessee Technological University in beautiful Cookeville, TN, which is roughly 70 miles east of Nashville. We chose this specific college because of its engineering accreditation and small-town atmosphere. Eager to get out of the sweltering confines of traffic zones, air pollution, and suspicious locale (at least where I lived), we packed our bags and headed east with a fistful of dollars and hardcore faith. Well, we moved into a student housing complex on campus that was an identical replica of government-housing. It was a humble living condition that I would later grow to despise over the next several months due to high crime rates, incompetent management, inadequate central heating and cooling, and unstable neighbors. I also watched as my hopes of attaining an engineering degree came to a grinding halt within the first two months of Fall semester as I discovered that this was not my calling (this is a subject of controversy with some close friends, so I will save the details for another day). As fall semester rolled into spring, my wife and I entered a serious time of doubt and reflection. Academically, I had made little headway and spiritually, we were both wanting because we had not yet plugged into a local church or met anyone we truly connected with. So in this bleak state of depression, my wife and I asked ourselves the difficult questions: Why are we here again? What do you want from us now, God? Did we do the right thing? We knew that God was still in control and that sometimes life just doesn't seem to unfold the way you had planned, so we took a simple stand and declared, "We have no idea where we go from here, so we will wait on you Lord and trust that You have an answer." Well, He did. A close friend who had been a strong source of inspiration for me for several years dropped by unexpectedly one day just to visit and see how we were doing in Cookeville. I told him everything that was going on and that we were considering just going back to Nashville to re-enter the workforce or moving to Ohio where my old band-members lived. He didn't beat me over the head or scold me, he just simply said, "I just want you to know that if you leave college now... you will never return. Just live with no regrets." As soon as he said that to me, I felt that explosion inside my brain that was an answer. To put it plainly, it was a word from the Lord Himself. It was at that moment that why we were here suddenly made sense. I knew that we came out here on faith, but I had to remember that it was faith that would also sustain us. You see, you cannot just start at point A on a little faith and expect to make the long journey to point B with your own two cents. It's the equivilant of filling your tank of gas in Nashville and assuming that that full-tank will sustain you on your trip to New York. Friend, eventually you will run out of gas and will be stuck with a bitter truth that you cannot do it alone. So now that the smoke had settled on that confusion, I informed my wife that I was going to finish what I began and that come hell or high water we would live with no regrets. She prayed and confirmed this to me to be our purpose. So here it is, July 2007. I am currently gathering the pieces and putting them back together. We are plugging into a church, I am working like a man is supposed to, I am retaking the impossible Calculus that nearly destroyed me last Fall, and am repairing the damage to the academic infrastructure to make sure I complete my B.S. in History in a successful, timely manner. To be truthful, I still wonder why on earth we're here in this town far from things that would make life much more predictable and comfortable, but I know that that is not the people my wife and I are called to be. We don't take the easy road because it goes against the grain of our soul. My wife and I were called together because we shared that bond: when life is suddenly comfortable, something isn't right. I don't know why, but I know that's the way God wired us and for that I make no apologies. So we are filled with contentment that we are pressing on and I dread to think what would have happened if I tucked tail and ran. Peace out!

Breathe in...

Out of the ashes of the socially-inept minefield known as myspace comes a new being: the Boy's Blog (otherwise known as Andy's new blogging page). The boy has simply become fed up with the flashbacks of high-school cliques that have resulted from the recent myspace experience. So it has been decided after concluding that blogging was the only productive means of expression the boy could find on myspace, he would dedicate his online outbursts solely to that purpose. Hence, a blogging site for someone who likes to blog has been established. The boy looks forward to a new start with new and old readers alike and hopes for a meaningful, digital friendship with all eyes that gaze upon his wit. Peace on!